![]() To top off the look, I'm also a transvestite - wearing a really dodgy wig, a short denim skirt, and about half a pound of badly applied slap. ![]() ![]() Not for me the inconspicuous Slavic looks of Niko Bellic I'm an aging, saggy, 30-stone Asian guy (with enormous moobs) who minces through the streets with a supermodel's catwalk sashay. Unfortunately, I'm probably not that hard to find. And somewhere along the way I smacked tramps around with a baseball bat, and found a nice new crib for my gang (tastefully decked out as pimps and hos). By teatime I'd discovered the joys of racking up impressive or excruciating kills. Then I went on a drive-by spree to stir things up with a rival gang, whose taste for green clothing offends my sense of fashion. By mid-morning, I was spraying an entire neighbourhood with human excrement from a hijacked sewage truck in the hope of dropping the property values (and I drowned some cops in liquid faeces for good measure). I started the day with a daring one-man raid on a courtroom, which ended when I shot a Judge Judy-style harpy in the face with a shotgun. Mind you, in the last couple of hours I've been doing my utmost to piss everyone off.
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